Thursday 8/30/2007
3:41 p.m.
You know what needs more cowbell? The bulldogs.
On the opening night of college football the team hasn’t won more than three games in a season since 2000, host the No.2 ranked team in the nation, the LSU tigers. Even though the Bulldogs have lost seven straight to LSU by a total of 295-81, including shutouts of 51-0 and 42-0, the team and fans are optimistic.
Anything can happen. The Tigers could mysteriously come down with a severe case of amoebic dissintary (Attention all Abner's or Little Dewey's employees: Make sure you put some of your meat out in the sun. You know, just in case some Tigers get hungry.) And nobody really knows what our team is going to look like. We may be the most unstoppable force to hit something from Louisiana since Hurricane Katrina. Okay, that was a bad reference. Chill out everyone. I'm from MS. I can make jokes about the bitch who destroyed our land. Moving on.
So, put on your maroon and white. Grab your neighbor's cow and rip the bell from his neck. Steal a bulldog from the pet store. Grab the Baja Men's hit single, blast it from your speakers and ask, "Who let tha dawgs out?"
Croom did.
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